My family and I were sitting outside.  I was feeling as if I could not breath, I just could not accept he was gone, nor did I believe it because we did not get to view his body prior to police removing body. I was feeling like I just wanted to die and be with him and my mother.  We had had just buried my precious mother on October the 9th the day before my brother suicide. I was feeling as if the world had stopped. I had never in my life felt so out of control. 

I remember looking up and seeing this car coming and I recognized the car, it was my nephews friend car.  I looked in fully expecting to see them but I saw my brother Angel sitting on the passenger side.  I remember just staring and running towards the car, I remember being so happy and thinking I knew it, I knew he was not gone but when I looked inside it was my nephew sitting on the passenger side not Angel.  My sister Norma was right behind me and I turned around and looked at her and we both burst into tears, she said I saw him too, where did he go.  I remember touching my nephew face trying to erase him to bring Angel back but of course it was only my emotions getting the best of me.

Was the experience difficult to express in words?     Yes   hard because people did not believe my sister and I saw him but it we both reacted at the same time.

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?   No                                   

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?   No                   

Did you see the deceased?   Yes    He looked exactly as he always did minus his eyes, his eyes looked lost.  He looked as if he was searching for something but could not find it.  Those eyes continue to hunt me today.

How clearly did the deceased appear?   100% clear, I had zero doubt he was in the car.

How much of the deceased did you see?    His whole face.

Did the deceased appear or not appear to be the age at which they died?   Yes, he appeared just as he did the day before when we buried my mother.

How healthy did the deceased appear to be?    He appeared to be healthy but his eyes looked lost.

Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?    no

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?    No                

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?   Uncertain     He just looked so lost.

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know?   no

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?    Experience was definitely real    I know I saw my brother, there is zero doubt in my heart that he was sitting in that car.

Was the experience dream like in any way?    No   

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?    No   

What was the best and worst part of your experience?    Best part was believing he was still alive and the worst was realizing he was truly gone from my life.  It was almost as if he died again when I realized he was not in the car.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?    Yes    I feel as if I died with them.  There is no joy in my life anymore, only confusion when it comes to him.  I no longer have the faith that I use to have and I and I no longer pray like I use too.   

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?    Yes    Started to believe that maybe just maybe we might be together again.

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?    No    

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?   No

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?    Yes    My sister

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?       No   

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?        No   

Did you become aware of future events?           No   

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?     No   

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?    No   

Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?    No   

Did you see a light?    No   

Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above?   No   

Have you shared this experience with others?    Yes    My sister who experienced it, does not wish to talk about it and the rest of the family thinks I am crazy.

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?    No    Never shared until today.   

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?    No   

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?   No   

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?      No