Ginny B's
ADC From Patient
|
He was
discharged on Wednesday. Thursday night I came in to work at
11pm. The nurses told me that
James had died in his sleep that morning. So he only got one night at home. I
was devastated. I planned to go to his funeral on Saturday at 2pm with two
other nurses who knew the area well. Friday night I worked an extra four hours,
coming in at 7pm instead of the usual 11pm. So I had worked all week 11pm to
7am with an extra four hours on Friday night. Saturday morning came and I was
exhausted though I still planned to stay awake for the funeral at 2pm. One of
the nurses had already cancelled going to the funeral the day before. Then the
other nurse called me Saturday morning and said she wasn't going either!
Then I was in a quandary. Atlanta is a big city and I wasn't sure if I could find the funeral home by myself or not. I called the funeral home and they gave me directions to go to Peachtree Street. If you know Atlanta at all, you'd know that EVERY STREET is named Peachtree Street or some variation of that. I didn't know if I could find it or not and I was getting really tired at that point - it was about 10 or 11am and way past my bedtime. I had been counting on the others to drive me there because I knew I'd be sleep deprived by that point, plus I didn't know the area. I was so angry about this situation that I stayed up, still going back and forth in my mind about whether to go or not. Although I was exhausted, I couldn't sleep. I reluctantly made up my mind that I would not go to the funeral. I guess it was about 12 noon at that point. I remember I was sitting on the sofa trying to unwind.
That's
when it started. I heard James's voice in my mind just as clear as day saying
"Ginny, please go....please Ginny....please....please go." I was in a state of
shock at hearing his voice urging, begging, pleading with me to go to his
funeral. Although I had heard from my dad after his death, I still couldn't
quite believe I was also hearing from James. I knew why he was urging me to go
though. It was for the sake of his dear wife. I knew she was probably
devastated. But I knew that it was dangerous for me to be out on the streets of
Atlanta being sleep-deprived though. So I got a little perturbed because James
kept on insisting that I go. He kept saying "Ginny....please,...please go...."
I was really uncomfortable because of his persistence. This went on for about
two hours. This begging and pleading finally and abruptly came to a halt. I
looked at the clock. It was 2pm.
Did you sense an awareness or
presence of the deceased without actually seeing, hearing, feeling or smelling
them ? No
Did you hear the deceased or
hear something associated with the deceased?
Yes
Describe:
Yes, I heard "Ginny....please go...please Ginny....please go..." over and over
and over and over again until 2pm
Did the voice or
sound seem to originate externally, or outside of you, inside of you, or did you
not hear a voice or sound but had a knowing of what was communicated?
In my mind.
If you heard a
voice or sound, was it similar or dissimilar to the voice or sound the deceased
made when they were alive? It
was exactly as he sounded when alive.
How clearly did you
hear the deceased? Clear as
day.
Is there any
possibility that what you heard was from any other source in the surroundings at
the time of your experience? Absolutely not.
Was there any
possible impairment to your hearing at the time of the experience?
No.
Did you feel a touch or
experience any physical contact from the deceased?
No
Did you see the deceased?
No
Did you smell a distinct
smell, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?
No
How long did the
experience last? For about 2 hours, more or less.
Was the beginning and end
of the experience gradual or more sudden?
Both the beginning and the end were abrupt. It just started and then it just
ended.
Could you sense the emotions
or mood of the deceased? Oh yes. He was desperate that I go to his funeral.
Describe:
Oh yes. He was desperate that I go to his funeral.
Describe in detail your
feelings/emotions during the experience:
I was uncomfortable because I had wanted to go to the funeral. I felt like I
was letting him and his wife down. But under the circumstances, I didn't feel
like I should be on the highway, so I was a little pissed off at him for begging
me to go to his funeral. I also felt a little dazed at hearing his voice when I
knew he was dead, but I just KNEW it was him.
What other
attitudes and beliefs about your experience do you currently have:
Other Attitude or Belief
I believe I should have gone to the funeral anyway and prayed for
God's strength to keep me awake and safe and for help finding the funeral home.
Was there any emotional
healing in any way following the experience?
Yes
Describe:
I was glad to know that James was ok even though he seemed to be in torment that
none of the nurses who took care of him would be at his funeral (for his wife's
sake.)
Did the experience give you
any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?
Yes
Describe:
Prior to this, I had heard from my dad after he died. I thought that was a
one-shot deal. No more communicating with the dead. I was wrong.
Have you ever made a death compact? No
Did you ever in your life have a near-death
experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?
Yes
Describe: No
OBE's or NDE's but plenty of spiritual experiences of God.
To the best of your knowledge, did the deceased,
during their life, ever have a near-death experience, out of body experience or
other spiritual experience? Uncertain
Describe: We
never discussed that.
Have you shared this experience with others? Yes
Describe:
I told my mother. She didn't know what to think. I also told some of the
nurses I worked with who knew the patient. These girls were open minded and
believed me.
Have you shared this
experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?
No
What
emotions/feelings did you experience following your experience?
Uncomfortable, perturbed, dazed.
What was
the best and worst part of your experience?
The best part was hearing from James again. The worst part was the message
itself. I felt guilty because I didn't go to his funeral.
Is there
anything else you would like to add regarding your experience?
No.
Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?
Yes
Describe: I always listen for any messages coming to me after a patient dies.
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life,
medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?
No
Did the questions asked and information you provided
accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?
Yes