Francesca S
ADC
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My husband died on the 6th of July 1996, I never accepted his sudden death. He was killed in Germany on the Autobahn in a car crash, in which he was innocent; the other guy came out of it without a scratch. Anyway
After his death I kept hearing, smelling and seeing him (seeing him, was only in my dreams, but were they really just dreams?).
The most important contact that I have experienced was the first Christmas without him, actually it was New Years Eve.
All my friends would call me and invite me and the boys over to party, so I wouldnt be alone, but I didnt want to, they kept calling one after the other, at the end I unplugged the phone. I wanted to be alone and make an end to my misery; I was looking for heavy medications, strong enough that my boys and myself could join their father in heaven. They were already asleep and I was thinking, that I have to take them with me, because they couldnt survive my going anyway, so I wanted to end their misery, too. But somehow I got so tired in my searching (I mean really tired, I barely could keep my eyes open, as if I would have already taken some sleeping pills), but I didnt have enough in the house, so somehow I went to sleep.
I woke up by the sound of the popping of a champagne bottle and the voice of my husband, telling me to get up and not to sleep through the New Year. He poured champagne in glasses and kept telling me to wake up and get up, he wanted to celebrate. I actually answered him, I told him to let me sleep, I was too tired to celebrate and anyway with all this noise he would wake up the boys. And he said I have to wake them up anyway to see the fireworks, he kept talking and talking to get up and drink with him in celebration of the New Year, he stood in the doorway of my bedroom calling me lazybones. Finally tired of listening to him nagging at me, I got up. What a surprise, he wasnt there and I realized he could not have been there, because he passed away 5 months earlier, but it was so real; I got up just in time to wake up the boys and see the fireworks with them.
As I said I had many more, but this one stayed really with me.
Blessings,
Cesca
Was this experience difficult
to express in words?
No
Did you hear the deceased or
hear something associated with the deceased?
Yes
Describe what
you heard, how clearly you heard it and what was communicated:
As I described in the above story,
I heard him, saw him, talked to him, I truly thought he was there.
And that
all before I read any books about ADC...but I knew he WAS there!
Did the voice or
sound seem to originate externally or outside of you, inside you, or did you not
hear a voice or sound, but had a sense of knowing what was communicated?
It was outside of me, it came from
the door, where he was standing, I even turned to him
If you heard a
voice or sound, was it similar or dissimilar from the voice or sound the
deceased made when they were alive?
Exactly the same voice as when he
was alive, exactly the same!
Is there any
possibility what you heard was from any other source present in the surroundings
at the time of your experience?
No, absolutely not...!
Was there any
possible impairment to your hearing at the time of the experience?
No...
Did you feel a touch or
experience any physical contact from the deceased?
No
Did you see the
deceased?
Yes
He was dressed in his favorite
jeans and t-shirt, as usual really!
How clearly did
the deceased appear?
Very solid, and very annoying
trying to get me up, even though I wanted to sleep
How much of the
deceased did you see?
He was standing in the door, I saw
him from head to toe!
Did the deceased
appear or not appear to be the age at which they died?
Yep, same age...
How healthy did
the deceased appear to be?
Really healthy, no cuts or bruises
from the accident, as if it never happened... the crash I mean!
Is there any
possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings
at the time of your experience?
Not a chance.
Did you smell a distinct
smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?
Yes
What smell,
scent, fragrance or odor did you smell?
Well yes, he had on his usual
cologne: Armani
Was the smell,
scent, fragrance or odor familiar?
Yes, his usual cologne after
shaving...
Was anything
communicated by the smell?
Not really, only that he was
there.
Is there any
possibility that the smell, scent, fragrance or odor was from any other source
present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?
No...
How long did the experience
last?
I don't know really, it seems
forever... the arguing back and forth:
Wake up
No, I don't want to
Wake up, you need to wake up the boys for the fire works....
And so
on...
Was the beginning and end of
the experience gradual or more sudden?
I don't know... He appeared
in the door, we argued, I gave up and got out of bed, and he was gone!
Could you sense the emotions
or mood of the deceased?
Yes
He was eager for me and the
boys to see the New Year's fire works...
He was
exited, he wanted to celebrate.
Did the deceased give you
information you did not previously know?
No, nothing. Even though we
all wanted to know how the accident happened.
But then,
when I was talking to him, I didn't realize he had the accident five months
prior.
How do you currently view the
reality of your experience?
Experience was definitely real
Please explain
why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:
I could feel him, I know he
was there, and he validated by coming back several times after that, and giving
me advice in stuff that was happening in my life.
Describe in detail your
feelings/emotions during the experience:
During the experience I didn't
have any emotions, because I was believing I was talking to my husband as usual.
Was there any emotional
healing in any way following the experience?
Uncertain
I thought I could contact him
any time I wanted, but I don't think there was healing, not at that point.
What was the best and worst
part of your experience?
The best part was of course: HE
WAS THERE
The worst
part? well, he left...
Has your life changed
specifically as a result of your experience?
Yes
Describe:
I thank God
every day for my blessings.
Did you have any changes
of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?
Yes Attitude, change of attitude, I was more open on welcoming
anybody in my family that passed on.
Did the experience give you
any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God,
etc.?
Yes
I know that our soul lives forever, that we can communicate with our loved ones,
some of us are better at this.
That there is no death, really, only the body decomposes.
And that
we are creatures of God.
Death Compacts
are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies
first will try to contact the other(s). Have you ever made such a
compact?
No
Never thought about this
before.
Did you observe or hear
anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be
verified later?
Yes James Van Praagh told me
that he visited a lot.
What emotions did you feel
during the experience?
Wow.... he was here, oh my God, he
came to me...
I was
exited, happy that he came, and sad that he was physically gone!
Was the experience witnessed
or experienced by others?
No
Did you have any sense of
altered space or time?
No
Did you have a sense of
knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?
No
Did you become aware of future
events?
Yes
Every time I would feel him, I
would make sure to greet him and tell him I love you.
I just
knew!
Have you shared this
experience with others?
Yes
I don't know if the people were influenced, but I know they believed me.
They
didn't think I was a nut case.
Have you shared this
experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web
site?
Yes
I posted on the James Van
Praagh website.
And I sent
it to Bill Guggenheim.
Is there anything else you
would like to add regarding your experience?
It was way to short, I wish it
would have lasted forever.
Were there any associated
medications or substances with the potential to affect the
experience?
No
Following the experience, have
you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which
reproduced any part of the experience?
No
Did you ever in your life have
a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual
event?
Yes
Out of body experience,
maybe...
I saw my husband in spirit, my parents, my 2 sets of grandparents, my 2 uncles, my sister in-law, and one aunt sitting all together at a round table playing cards, laughing and talking to each other (which was odd, because down here they all soke different languages).
When they
saw me, my dad and my husband pushed me outside, telling me I wasn't supposed to
be there, and then I fell from my bed!
Did the questions asked and
information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your
experience?
Yes
Please offer any suggestions
you may have to improve this questionnaire.
Maybe to let people explain their
"NOs" as well...