My father died the morning of June 21, 2003.  He suffered for a long time, so although we all missed him - we were happy that he was in heaven and no longer suffering.  That night, I asked mom if I could sleep in the room with her.  I was laying in bed trying to fall asleep.  I opened my eyes and saw my father at the foot of my bed.  I could make out his facial features, he looked young and was smiling.  The rest of his form was misty and 'sparkly'...like the flickers of light you see after you have had a really good sneeze.  He looked beautiful.  I blinked, and he was gone. 

Shortly after his death, I dreamt that we were sitting across from each other and with a big smile, he said "You don't know how hard it was."  I understood that he was referring to him hiding his pain and suffering to make it easier on us. 

As most people do, I had my good days and my bad days.  I was having a particularly bad day a couple of months after his death, laying in bed crying for my father.  I said to myself something like "I can't hug him anymore, so I guess I'll just hug my pillow."  A week or two later I dreamt that he told me that all I have to do is think of him and he would be there.  Then he showed me the scene of me lying in bed talking about hugging the pillow, and he was standing at the foot of the bed watching me.  I excitedly said, "You were there!"  He said, "Of course I was."  We hugged and smiled and then I woke up.    

I had another dream where he made a brief appearance but looked like someone else.  I KNEW it was him and asked him why he looked different.  He said something about having to use a different body and then waved his hand as if to say, "Drop the subject"....almost like it was a big no-no for him to be visiting me. 

The last dream I had was just last week.  I find myself walking along a country path.  The sky was a comfortable overcast.  I came upon a type of commune being built.  Dad walked up to me and we hugged our 'hellos'.  I said "looks like you've been working hard."  He said, "Well yes, James and I both." (I felt he was talking about my Uncle James, his best friend, who is still with us).  I saw a shell of a small room with a fully made bed inside.  I said "Is this my room?"  He says, "No, that is your cousin Stephanie's room.  Come here I want to show you something."  Next thing I see is what looked like a completed bedroom with a big corner Jacuzzi in it.  I excitedly said, "Is this my room!"  He says, "Yes it is."  I gushed and told him how I loved it, rubbing my hand along the beautifully colored tiles that encased the tub.  I asked, "It's not finished yet, is it?!" (My way of asking if it's time for me to come home).  He said, "No, but it's almost finished."  We sat down at a table and my grandmother was there (still alive also).  I felt that we were eating but there was no food.  After, we walked back to the construction area that I first met up with him.  Standing beside me, he looks over and says, "So what are you going to do about your mother and your sister?"  I said, "Help them get along the best I can,"  unsure of exactly what he was asking me.  He said, "You don't HAVE to..."  but looked at me as if to say that would be a good idea.  I knew it was time to go and hugged him, starting to cry.  I felt that the next time I saw him would be when it was time for me to move into my room.  I woke myself up with my crying.  

I will cherish these moments that God gave me with my father.  It has really helped me through my grief.  And by the way, a few days ago my sister got really peeved with my mom and I helped patched things up.  My sister said, "I guess that is what Dad meant when he asked what you were going to do about me and Mom!"

Was this experience difficult to express in words? 

No

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?         

No

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?           

Yes

A hand on my back.  I feel it there frequently.  It is very reassuring.

            Was the touch familiar or unfamiliar?  

Very familiar.  Dad would always walk up to me and put his hand on my back, like a mini-hug.

            Is there any possibility what you felt was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience? 

No, it happens far too frequently.

Did you see the deceased?        

Yes

see story above

            How clearly did the deceased appear?            somewhat transparent

            How much of the deceased did you see?       the head  the rest of the form was 'misty' (see above)

            Did the deceased appear or not appear to be the age at which they died?       He appeared about 25-30 yrs old.  He was 51 when he died.

            How healthy did the deceased appear to be?            Very healthy

            Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           No

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?     

No

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?          

Yes, Calm, peaceful, content.

Did the deceased give you information you did not previously know? 

No

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?          

Experience was definitely real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:         

I am not crazy, I have never experienced this before, but my beliefs confirm that these incidents are possible and do happen.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?  

Yes

During the dreams, I know I was asleep; but the dream was in sequence and very vivid.

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:          

Happy

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?          

Yes

He reassured me that he would always be there for me and he will still be my father, even after death.

Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s).  Have you ever made such a compact?   Yes

I told Dad to haunt the 'hell' out of me!  We laughed about it.

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            Happy

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?           No

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Yes

Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?            Yes

grandmother...I knew my Uncle was there but did not see him, just felt his presence.